And that’s a wrap. Theonemileslide is done. 9 months, 10 Counties, 20,000km overland. Seven surfboards, 80 new spots, 300+ sessions, 5000 or so waves…  Countless new friends, good times and life-changing experiences. Thanks to everyone I met and travelled with along the way, you’re all legends and made this trip what it was: Super-f#@king-awesome.

Best of the best. Chilean perfection


Oh yea, have been asked whether the one mile slide actually happened. Unfortunately No. Longest rides probably went something like:

Pavones (Costa): 400m
La punta (Mex): 450m
Punta Lobos (Chile): 500m
Puntilla (Chile): 600m
Chicama (Peru): 900m – though you could ride the full 2k length by getting a few waves down the point

So all in all….Fail. Will have to try again. Sigh.

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LA and OUT

Today I walked past a guy with a sign that said jobless, homeless and hungry. Initially I felt bad and considered turning around and giving the guy a few bucks for a bagel but then I realised….I’m jobless, homeless….and at the time, hungry. The fact that I had a few dollars in my pocket is only due to the retards at my bank upping my credit limit and the IRD not knowing where to find me for the last year. In fact, all things considered, you’re probably better off than me (but I smell better). Hook me up with some of that bagel brudda!



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Southbound and down

From San Fran it’s a quick trip north up into Sonoma wine country for food & vino with la Familia then another long roadie back down south. Call back in at San Luis Obispo for a few waves with Johnnie and to pick up a sweet new shooter courtesy of his mate Zephyr at Nimbus. Frothing on this thing!! Then back to Oceanside for a few days of beachside resort living and combo-swell wedges at the Pier. Bit down on the imminent return to reality but all good things must come to an end and good doesn’t begin to describe the last year in the Americas.




Oside from above

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Hey buddy, can ya spare some change?

Favourite bum request so far in San Fran: “Hey buddy, can ya spare some change? Trying to get a few bucks together to get me a hooker….”

Unfortunately, most aren’t as creative but just as desperate and its depressing to see in a city this progressive. I would have thought addressing these problems at home would take priority over telling the rest of the world how to live…. but hey, what would I know.

What I do know is that there’s a wave under the Golden Gate Bridge that only works when its huge…. Its cold, foggy and pretty miserable out there but its gotta be done (after buying new booties and gloves for the second time this trip dammit!). Paddling out, it looked kinda mushy with mainly kooks & mals so paddled pretty deep inside up the rocks. Nice one came through, caught it, went to get up and discovered that my brand new slick-skin gloves don’t stick without wax….slip once, slip twice, by the time I stand i’m freefalling onto the rocks. Jumped off but too late – swept up onto the rocks right under the crowd & spent the rest of the set seal-rolling off them. Fail. Lost the gloves and things went slightly better. Entertained by a longboarder and a shortboard having a go at each other. Things got so heated that shortie paddled over and sat on longie’s board – so now they could go off at each other from 6 inches apart. Interestingly it never got to punches thrown….?

Next morning has cleaned up and Ocean Beach is 6 foot, offshore and Pumping. Unusual i’m told. Visit Mollusk surf-shop, Very cool and definitely worth a look if you’re in town and catch up with Max who I haven’t seen since we surfed some insane lefts together in the south of Chile months ago.

Shift change: Matty out for NZ and Raglan – will miss ya bud and Mum & Sal in for a couple of weeks of Cali-cruisin. Great to see them after nine months on the road & looking forward to hanging with them both for a while.


Ocean Beach - 6 foot, offshore, pumping


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central coast cruisin

Leaving San Diego we bypass LA and head straight for the central coast where the first good NW swell of the year is due. First stop Ventura to hunt out some little ramps to live out our Dane Reynolds fantasies (we watched way too much Spills & Thrills). Saw someone bust an insane 360 out @ C-street. Figured it was probably Dane or someone but when he came in we saw it was actually Lakey Peterson. Ripping Chica!

Unfortunately Dane was in France and we’re quite shit surfers so after finding some little wind-blown chunk-burgers at Silver Strand we head north to catch up with our mate Johnnie. John lives with his lovely family at Morro Bay & is Amped to have some Kiwis in town to show around. Especially amped to take us into The Ranch – a Californian icon. The ranch is a private landholding with land access solely restricted to owners. Given the Californian crowds its not surprising that well-off (generally older) surfers hare happy to part with 5mil for access to the dozen or so points and reefs within. This creates a somewhat divided crowd with the land-access guys (owners) chatting happily within themselves but completely ignoring the boat guys, and the boat-guys (generally better, younger surfers) happily leaving them to talk while paddling deeper up the point. Apparently they’re trying to get boats banned on environmental grounds – ironically ignoring the fact they drive on the beaches to get to the waves….

Unfortunately the swell never really fills in and while we can see the potential and have a few little waves its just not quite happening. We spend a few more days chasing waves around Morro & the surrounds before continuing north – next stop Santa Cruz. Thanks to Johnnie and his lovely family for the unbelievable hospitality. Welcome in NZ anytime!


Santa Cruz. I don’t have much to say about Santa Cruz except there are lots of derros on the streets, lots of college kids in the bars & lots of seals on the pier – this one’s called Gus. Later Santa Cruz.


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Don’t lie to me boy!

“Don’t lie to me boy, the camera can tell if you’re lying to me!”

Was Matty’s introduction to the US of A. Other awkward questions included:

“Why have you been travelling for so long!? Surfing? Surfing? what sort of surfing can you do for 8 months?”

“Why has your friend got a PhD. and you got Nuffin!?”

“Where do you hide your contraban?”

The day started pretty badly getting charged $400 in excess baggage on a $200 United flight (apparently the boards were both oversize and overweight). Wouldn’t have been quite so bad if they didn’t smash the nose of the Brewer in the process! Then, given the third degree by LAX immigration/customs (any longer than two weeks travelling & they assume you mustn’t be gainfully employed & therefore engaging in drug running or similar activities to pay the bills)…. Finally got out of that and figured we were about through the worst of it when we got to the “Thrifty” rental car…. Lets just say appearances can be deceiving and the ‘compulsory insurance‘ added on at the counter was three times the original rental price! Gotta love visiting a broke state.

So we finally get on the 405 south to San Diego just in time for Friday arvo rush hour traffic. By this time we haven’t eaten for 12 hours and are about over it. Finally get down to Oceanside (or Oside as referred to by the local white middle-class gangstas) & buy the biggest burger we’ve ever seen in our lives. We can’t even finish this thing! The surf off the pier’s pretty good but we’re struggling to move let along pull out wettie and board. Meet up with Derek for the first time since Panama & spend a few days with him surfing and cruising between Oceanside & San Diego. Waves are small but fun & waters not too cold (still…. glad I lugged the Patagonia all the way up here!)

As luck would have it the first big NW storm of the year is firing up and due early in the week. Our mate Johnnie on the central coast has lined up a boat for a mission into the legendary Ranch. Theonemileslide lives on!


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adios, chau, hasta luego Mexico

That’s all, its done. Point cranked, tommys left (sorry, but as i’m the only one surfing it i’ll freakin name it what I like) spat out barrels like a….barrel-spitting machine and the beach break….well the beach break was just its usual gnarly, packed-with-boogies, uninviting self. Did pick up a new addition to the family courtesy of my mate Reilly – a pristine 9’0 Brewer gun. She’s a beautiful machine – though i’m not sure if she’ll ever be field tested in truly adequate conditions….

Time to part ways with Hectic & the big G. Thanks for the memories and enjoy the rest of the trip boys, its been alltime. Californian-bound with Matty-dub to catch up with a few of the great crew we’ve met along the way. Will miss you Mexico with your unexpectedly good lefthand point, tortillas with every meal and generally random flavour.

Tommys left.....

La Punta - still going all day every day


Newest addition to the family

After four months of wear from Peru to Mexico #1 surf-shirt reaches retirement

From where you're rather be....

Hello Mexico city….. you’re just like every other city…. but mexican flavored.




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Sometimes you’re timings on, sometime you’re like a wayward Wallaby backline. We thought we were killing it heading north to a secret righthand rivermouth just in time for a new swell…but we forgot to check the wind and were greeted by 40 knot onshores for the first two days – damping everyone’s spirits, exhausted our rum supply and bringing half our palapa roof down on us. Then….it turned on….and stayed on…. All day, every day. We clock up some serious time in the water, meet half of Australia, watch a couple of locals chasing each other around with sticks and knives (apparently someone’s wife got a bit independent during independence day celebrations…) and enjoy our time immensely. Great atmosphere in the water when its full of Australians and Kiwis without a local or Brazo in sight. Timing on the backhand even seems to be on the improve…

The setup...



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The kitchen sink

Congratulations to Mr Greg Long – wave of the summer.               photo: Surfline

After throwing the kitchen sink at us last weekend only to have disrespectful young punks from Hawaii paddle out on shortboards and Greg Long catch wave of the summer, the Pacific would appear to be sulking. Swell has dropped by the day and while we had some cracking days on the point and then the beach break, Puerto’s starting to look like….well Manly in Sept. While we haven’t exactly been rushed off our feet the last few weeks it does feel like we’ve been on the move constantly and a few extremely relaxing lay days at Casa de Dan’s have gone down very well.

With time in Mexico running out, chance for one last little mission. This time to a right hand rivermouth just up the coast that everyone’s been frothing over. With apparently amazing sand at the moment and new swell due Tuesday I think we’ll be timing our run pretty well….

La Punta - still doing it


Bonnie Geronimo getting creative (and wet)

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With a huge swell on the way we had counted on the southern Mexican rights to deliver but a chronic lack of sand rendered sticking around somewhat pointless. So back to Puerto Escondido for the pro-show. And the pro-show it was; all-star cast flown in, Red Bull jet skis, photogs galore. But while last swell was ‘friendly’ by Puerto standards, this was…NOT. Too SW to hit the canyon properly resulting in huge straight walls, heaving closeouts, ½ mile flash-rips and one seven minute hold-down!? (and still alive). Super impressive but definitely not for us. Again, the point provided sanctuary with even better sand now. Mechanical, tubing perfection….


Reef left

Johnjohn right


Punta Perfecta


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